Fic: A Peek into Cross Marian's Mind 2

[iris-irin3.livejournal.com]

Title: A Peek into Cross Marian's Mind
Character: Cross Marian
Summary: Cross was a free spirit, no mortal (or even immortal) entity could ever deter him from his goal.

A short chapter...

*Edit: fixed grammar

2. Enmity/Animosity

Cross was always constantly travelling from town to town, from brothel to brothel, from woman to woman. Not that he was complaining, he rather liked it. What he didn't like was the travelling he had to do lately. Cross was a free spirit, no mortal (or even immortal) entity could ever deter him from his goal.

But one golden round golem might.

In fact, Cross Marian had been following Timcanpy around for some time now. He found it ironic, that the master is following the golem instead of the other way around.

He swore silently to himself that he would make the Fourteenth's successor (whoever he was) pay dearly for this. Oh, you'll see...

Comments

[mittens-220.livejournal.com]

Yay! First comment!

I can really sense Cross' personality from this chapter as well. I fear for Allen now, Cross seems rather pissed that he had to follow something...

Some grammar corrections...you should change your first and second sentence to this:

Cross was always constantly travelling from town to town, from brothel to brothel, from woman to woman. Not that he was complaining, he rather liked it.

...It's a habit. I have been correcting and editing my sister's fanfiction stories ever since she started writing.

[iris-irin3.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much, I really appreciate the corrections. I kind of suck at grammar so it really helps :P

Hehehe, it gives a reason why Cross enjoys torturing Allen.

[closeincline.livejournal.com]

Wow, that is pretty nice! And really interesting!
Cross might be a little passive aggressive, if that is really the case...lol.